(via c0ntemplations)
...All of my pieces, they were all taken from me, but it's still too early for a checkmate
The saddest thing in the world is when you’re really excited to see a person and you’ve imagined all these scenarios in your head about how it would go and then you get there and it’s awkward and you’re both distant and you leave with this crushing sadness and this insistence that that wasn’t how it was supposed to be
dude. this is real. this is really real.
My heart.
Step 314: When you make a big life change, the first few months will probably suck. Push through it.
A good friend of mine is in the midst of pulling the trigger on something she’s wanted to do for a long time — departing Portland for Brooklyn. If you knew her, you’d know it’s the right decision, but she’s still grappling with the fear of the unknown/grief for the life one is leaving behind.
Here’s the thing about making any big decision about ending something (your physical location, your career, your relationship): the first few months that come after it suck.
For a week or so, you’ll get that novelty euphoria — so many new places to walk! New smells! New flirting opportunities, if you’re single! New desk! — and then, discomfort sets in. You miss your old things. You miss being able to know exactly where to go for good Vietnamese food, and how to get there. You get lost. You transgress some unwritten rule and feel like an asshole.
These feelings do not mean you’ve made the wrong decision. You can’t really evaluate something new at first. So when you’re feeling frustrated, when you’re feeling lost, when you’re asking yourself why, why, why you made this choice, push through it. Examine your feelings of loss from a distance — of course you miss your old city/job/significant other. The only way you wouldn’t miss it is if there was nothing redeeming about that time in your life.
So just wait. Know that your sadness will not kill you. Give it three months.
